I Have No Idea What I'm Doing.

we're trying to raise money for our senior BFA photo show. any tiny donation helps! :)

three of the main images i'm using for my senior show. ta daaa.

oh, Sir Elton John. your Yellow Brick Road album is forever engrained in my brain.  anyhoo, happy saturday! got out of work at 6pm, bought some hot pink nail polish and a new LIGHT pink lipstick (this is how i keep myself entertained when there aren't friends around), and headed home to feed the gatos and entertain myself on yet another evening spent hanging out with myself.  i just finished watching Scream 2 , and i'm about to start watching Scream 3 . these movies were SO MAJOR when i was younger, and watching them is a major '90s throwback. i'm kiiinda loving it :) note: jada pinkett-smith on the poster, even though she was in the movie for only the first 10 minutes. who's that babe in the back on the right? why, it's parker posey of course! :D love her. a. lane, over and out. xo

YAAAY! can't wait to read it and try the recipes. so excited. wooooo. :)

i just read the first few pages of this book on Amazon.com (i'd previously heard about it on Oprah, the ONE TIME i've ever actually watched it), and i'm fairly certain that i've fallen desperately in love with it and must own it as soon as possible.

i'm not really motivated to do a big post, my brain is a little blank. it's one of those times where there's a lot going on at once, and it all just cancels out so my brain ends up just feeling empty. i will, however, update with photos because they're way more fun anyways....  so on sunday, shmemily and i went to the best Mexican joint in the city, Viva El Mariachi. this joint also happens to be in my 'hood, and probably also the best Mexican food i've had outside of Mexico. this is what i had, huevos mexicanos- scrambled eggs with peppers, rice, beans, and then i drowned the eggs in the most amazing salsa ever in the world. and then i made breakfast tacos :) em got the enchilada burrito, which also looked delicious, but is like, totally stuffed with meat so i didn't try it. i'm sure it was delicious though. i stole the guac off the top of it...i left her some, of course. sunday evening, sully came into the city for a tattoo appt, which i accompanie...

i find that being truly well-rested is an achievement not often met. this is not to say that i'm always walking around like an overtired zombie, but i find the times where i can claim to honestly be energized and not at all tired are quite rare. i also find that my periods of being wide-awake and being totally exhausted are coming 'round at THE MOST incovenient of times, like 2am and in the middle of a work day, respectively. like, the other night (tuesday, i believe it was) i was WIDE AWAKE hours after i'd usually go to bed, and i had to be awake at 6:30am to take a test at 8. well, my sorry ass didn't get to bed until 4:30am, and didn't go to bed again until about 5:30am the next morning. and even though i slept in yesterday, my ass was TIIIRED this afternoon! and now i'm home, and awake, only 30 minutes away from my self-appointed "bedtime". truth be told, i was hoping to be in bed a couple hours ago, but again...i'm awake. in any case, i decid...

"of course, there's the slight possibility i'm being a wee bit harsh. i mean, not every "romantic" experience has to be a horrifying death ride, does it? it's probably just a matter of perception, or misperception, or deception or...i don't know, some sort of "ception"- let's leave it at that. and just because my blackened heart pumps toxic dust through a palsied frame to an emotionally crippled soul, doesn't necessarily preclude me from seeing the proverbial silver lining in the unrelenting apocalyptic shit storm that is sure to be the death of us all, right?"- Peter J. Darchuk, "Singlehood vs Couplehood", ANTENNA magazine, spring break 2010. now that i've shared that with you all, i'm going to go pass the fuck out because i'm in a painful food coma.

it all started innocently enough, but last night got real weird real fast. i'm not even going to get into it, nothing bad happened, i'm just glad it was close to home. oy. EDIT: ok so i explained my night to sarasil, it goes a little something like this (click it to blow it up so you can actually read it):

i'm exhaustipated. running on two hours of sleep. my memory has been reduced to that of a goldfish (with good tattoos, according to forrest ). i need sleep, but also maybe a Guiness. we'll see. i need focus and edit some photos...maybe if i accomplish anything i'll post up some of my artwork to share with the world. woooo... oh PS i dont give a crap about St. Patrick's Day.

what? don't judge us. chastine , where are you with your black goth lips?!

my friends released their latest music video today.  it's preeetty awesome, & it goes a little something like this: Alesana - "The Thespian" from Revolver Magazine on Vimeo . AND, my other friends released their music video YESTERDAY (i think). these friends are like family, and i support them in (almost, hehe) everything that they do. i always wish the most brilliant success, but they seem to be doing just fine :) <3

I'm a brilliant woman, as some of you may already know. Usually I have class at 9am so, I got up and ready to go to be there at 9. Then, before I left, I remembered that my professor emailed us earlier in the week; usually that means some sort of special info about the class. Long story short- class met at 1045 & then again somewhere else at 1145, I slept in for an extra two hours, and this is the behavior of a Dean's List student. Moral: FIT is a joke (fact),and/or I'm ridiculously lucky slash favored by my professors. Anyway, it's a glorious day today and I will be spending the next 3 hours of it in this pathetic windowless box of a classroom learning Spanish conversation. Woof. Chastine is in Vegas for the next two weeks, so it's just me and April 'til Friday, and then it's just me. Sigh. I think I need to go get yogurt today to celebrate the sunshine, and also my love for yogurt. Stay tuned. Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

DEAN'S LIST?! you've GOT to be joking...

here is how i spent my day off, in pictures. part one of half-price happy hour- spinach & artichoke dip and veggie nachos. omgsodelicious. followed by part deux of half-price happy hour- banana split sundae. we made some serious love to this thing, and finished it in record time. our waiter even commented on how fast it was gone, to which we replied "...we might not be done yet." we decided to opt out of a second sundae though, as we were all superduper full about 10 minutes later. my lovely dates, april and chastine . i love candid photos. april may or may not be/love Aunt Jemima. may...or may not. chas decided to hide behind the giant menu. that's cool i guess. "will you be my butt valentine?" what does that even mean? none of us were entirely sure, but we were entirely sure about one thing: pictures needed to be taken. she claims she looks terrible in hats, but it turns out she's lying. sometimes we go to party stores and find bulk party fav...

i get bummed out when i lose my dude friends to girlfriends, as if maintaining a relationship with me will somehow threaten the relationship they have with this other person. that's ridiculous. if you know me at all, you know i'm not that kind of girl. i have your back, with or without a significant other. i don't even care if we have been significant to each other in the past- if it's weird enough, i'll stop talking to you all on my own and give you your relationship space. i'm a very perceptive lady, and i'm fully capable of sensing when my presence is or is not uncomfortable in certain circumstances. chances are, however, that i'm completely unphased and can seamlessly transition from "maybe slightly more than friends" to "completely, totally, just friends , i swear!!!" i always feel like i'm on this same level with my guy friends, until i realize that as soon as girlfriend entered (or re-entered, as the case may be) the pictu...

sostokedsoblessedsofisted. <3 loved it so much, it had to be x-posted. in other news, happy tuesday. it appears as though a sickness is going around again; i feel like this often happens around pre-spring/springtime. the change in seasons does a special thing to the human body: destroys it. whoop whoop, i'm phlegmy. eeew. i was supposed to study more for my history test last night, but i opted for rest and sleep instead. i guess i'll study double time, tonight. blaaaaarf (that's a "blah" into a "barf"). today i look forward to my happy hour date at Big Daddy's Diner with april and chastine ; mind you, our "happy hour" consists of half-priced appetizers, sodas, sundaes, and shakes (from 3-6pm, Monday-Friday...we don't go every day, but i'm sure we've all thought about it, more than twice).   this has definitely become one of my "happy places" in NYC and one of the things i shall miss most when i leave NYC. i wi...

My apartment wall was leaking from the rain last night- the wall right by my window in my bedroom. On the 4th floor, above the 3rd, below the 5th & 6th floors. Uh, why, or HOW, exactly was this happening in my overpriced one-bedroom apartment in Astoria? Remind me again WHY this would happen in an apartment inbetween floors? Or AT ALL, PERHAPS? In all the 4 years I've lived there, I've never had a problem like this...W.T. Fuck! Ok, rant over. Off to work, jamming to the new Of Mice & Men record because I love it (though the "screamy" vocals are weak...ah well). Enjoy your Sundays. Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

this is my "i'm studying US history on a saturday night and i dont feeeeeel like it" face...and that's loseph staring at me. also, it's so rainy and blustery here that there's actually been a storm warning issued. detrimental winds and flood warnings and such. how lovely. back to learning about the South now. ::sigh::

courtesy of one of my bffs, miss chastine vosvick . when i saw it, it made my insides sparkle :) still think i'm getting sick, but going to work today doesn't seem too entirely oppressive as the rain leaves me with two options: stay inside and be utterly unproductive (well, i guess i could keep working on that study sheet for US history...) or stay inside at work and make some money. not the most glorious forecast, but i do look forward to the sunshine in my future.

rain, NY rain especially, has the uncanny ability to almost entirely suck the life out of me. it's pretty terrible, i'd say. i look forward to living in a climate where rain is practically a myth, and occurs so rarely that the natives become a little frightened when it does. Los Angeles, i'm looking at you. my throat feels scratchy and i've been practically in a coma all day. thumbs way down. also...i really wish i had a boy to talk to. i mean, there's a long list of people i'm sure i could have a friendly text conversation with while i study for my US history exam for the next hour, but they're pretty much all girls and no disrespect to my lovely lady friends: i'd really like a nice dude to talk to. i had one of those for awhile, effed that up royally and now, even though we're talking again, it's a little strained. i just told the only nice, single dude in my life lately that i couldn't speak to him anymore due to "extenuating circums...

it was thursday, we know the drill.

i'm proud of myself for dragging my sorry ass out of bed and actually getting to class today. it let out super early, but i was productive and...oh my god i am so boring. my new roommate for the week, miss april atkins, and i will be going out to MJ somethingsomethings at 19th & 1st to support my girl christina as she bartends for the second time ever. shmem will be meeting up. i don't plan on drinking much, but it'll be good to go out since i don't have work until 4 tomorrow...oh my god, still boring. i'm done. hiii april!

today I burned my toast. ::sigh:: Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

so, i'm sitting at home, in my pjs, in front of my computer. technically, i'm supposed to be in class, but i'm a senior and i do what i want. also, it's not really a class i need to be present for and i just really thought staying in bed, though i was fully awake and capable of getting ready and going to school in a timely fashion, would be a way better way to spend my morning (until spanish at 2, of course).  i feel really good about this decision. i might even do some photography-related work to justify it, though. maybe. we'll see. last night was the last time (probably) that i'll ever see Copeland perform ever again. i've seen them a number of times, the first time being in 2004, i believe. sometime between 2003 and 2005 i know, because it was definitely during my first two years of college. the first time i saw them was on this TINY stage at this venue i'm not even sure exists still, somewhere in midtown-ish. i think it might have been the same v...

  i wanted to play, too!

  i sad-face NYC, too, sometimes.  and i will also probably sad-face LA sometimes, too. but that's OK, change is good. change is good. change is good. change. is. good. oh boy, i am scared.

today was such a brilliantly fantastic day, i couldn't have asked for a better Sunday. for starters, it was a warm 57 degrees. cloudless sky, sunny, a bit windy which is always annoying (especially if you're wearing lipgloss), but otherwise gorgeous. so gorgeous. the day started with brunch at Kate's Joint on the Lower East Side (Ave B & 4th) with two of my bffs, sully and chas. i got the sweat potato hash brunch special, which came with delicious bread, tofu scramble (i opted for vegan cheese), a screwdriver, and coffee. sarah got a vegan version of eggs benedict, said it was delish. chas got the organic oatmeal- a little to runny for my taste, but pretty OK i suppose.  after brunch, we went over to Whole Foods on 2nd Ave, i.e. THE BEST WHOLE FOODS EVER, or at the very least in all of NYC. it's ENORMOUS, and the only thing i love more than grocery stores are enormous health food grocery stores...ESPECIALLY with kombucha on tap! yes, kombucha ON TAP. 16oz for $2.9...