New Moon, New Year, New Me (kinda)

Well it's been over two years since I wrote a full entry and sooo so very much has happened since then. So very much that I'm not even going to attempt to detail anything about it, but I will give a quick overview: between Feb 2018 and September 2018 (just typed October because apparently I have no idea where I am in time anymore...), I embarked on what I will (begrudgingly) call a "spiritual journey" (oof, that sounds so cheesy). In mid-to-late 2016, a shift started happening and I really started to dive into a pool I had previously only dipped a toe in (crystals with Dad, practicing yoga, watching The Secret, astrology, chakras, whatnot); I knew something was changing inside of me, it was necessary and an upgrade, and I really started "doing the work", as They say.

ANYWAY, a couple years, some psilocybin journeys, an ayahuasca ceremony, countless meditations, reflections, shifts, and changes later, here I am in 2018. It's September (as I mentioned previously, and as you can see by the time stamp on this entry). Yesterday was the New Moon in Virgo as well as Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. It's also the beginning of the new school year in most places, and if you don't live in Los Angeles, it may have started to feel like Autumn is on the horizon (the only reminder we have of Autumn here in LA is all the Back To School ads, pumpkin everything everywhere, and how sometimes after the sun goes down, we can comfortably wear a light sweater). This is the time of Beginnings.

Even though the New Moon is the "end" of the moon cycle, it's also revered as the beginning of a new one- because that's how cycles work, duh. It is at this time that We (the Royal We, the pseudo-Pagan, metaphysical, witchy, spiritual We) acknowledge this time as a time of rest, reflection, and intention setting. What do we hope to accomplish and attract during the next cycle? What do we want to work on? Why am I so fucking tired? (New Moon, man. It's nap time, honor it.)

Additionally, I always feel when September rolls around that that's truly the start of the New Year. In Judaism, this is always the time that is acknowledged as the beginning of a new yearly cycle. Like, why would we honor the New Year in the middle of the winter? That's so weird and arbitrary. I'm pretty sure we can blame the Romans for this...whatever, anyway. It's September, it's a New Moon, and it's Rosh Hashanah, and this perfect storm of Newness has really stirred something inside of me that feels pretty fucking cool. 

February to July of this year was spent in an intense 300-Hour yoga teacher training. By the time it was over at the end of July, I was fucking spent. Oh my goodness. My brain was tired. My body was tired. My soul was tired. I, along with guidance from my lovely and amazing mentor, gave myself permission to take Vacation during August. Like, a Life Vacation. I actually did take a couple short trips during this month, but I told myself, "Starting September 1st, I'll get back to business. Until then, I'm checking out." (Funny enough: Literally like, two days after I proclaimed this at my teacher training graduation, I had an audition at a yoga studio- go figure.) I did check out. I ate whatever I wanted, I drank whatever I wanted (and also had two of THE WORST hangovers OF MY LIFE), pretty much ignored any non-pressing responsibilities that didn't directly contribute to keeping me or my cats alive. A month-long Life Vacation and man, did I need it. Shit. Wow. I went for it, I'm pretty sure I gained a little weight even (my pants fit, but they don't fit quite RIGHT...ugh.) and it was FUCKING AWESOOOME. Mostly, minus those hangovers and the weight gain. By the end of it, as September 1st approached...I was ready. I was partied out, man. I ate so many carbs...so so many carbs...I'm getting off topic. *dreams in bagel* I love you Yeastie Boys...

By the time September 1st came, after a month of turning off and tuning out, I was ready to rev my engine and move forward. On that day, I taught my first class at the yoga studio I had auditioned for. After feeling stagnant and uninspired for too long, I have creative inspiration for my jewelry designs. I *finally* figured out how I can create a work space in my own home after YEARS of working at the kitchen table. I'm focused on becoming a better yoga teacher. I'm taking care of my meat suit. I'm writing (blogging) again. Perhaps, most importantly, I'm not obsessing over (romantic) relationships (past or present) because it's simply not a priority. I'll probably write a whole blog about my feelings on love and relationships, and a whole other blog about "Why Are Men?", but I'm not going to get into either of those right now.

For the first time in a long time, after a long, arduous year of study and effort and work and transformation, I feel inspired (I just corrected a typo where "inspired" was "inspirted" and I just think "inspirted" is a hilarious word) and energized and educated and transformed. The work is consistent and never ending, but in this time of renewal and rejuvenation, I feel both renewed and rejuvenated and that's really cool. I don't feel like this often- I find being human to be an exhausting adventure- but right now, I'm ready to move forward and take on what is ahead of me with a positive outlook and attitude. I have my affirmations and I know what I wish to attract during this next moon cycle. I am excited for this New Year and what it will bring. And most of all, I'm excited that at some point this relentless heat will subside and I'll be able to comfortably wear a light sweater again.