rain rain, go away.

rain, NY rain especially, has the uncanny ability to almost entirely suck the life out of me. it's pretty terrible, i'd say. i look forward to living in a climate where rain is practically a myth, and occurs so rarely that the natives become a little frightened when it does. Los Angeles, i'm looking at you.

my throat feels scratchy and i've been practically in a coma all day. thumbs way down. also...i really wish i had a boy to talk to. i mean, there's a long list of people i'm sure i could have a friendly text conversation with while i study for my US history exam for the next hour, but they're pretty much all girls and no disrespect to my lovely lady friends: i'd really like a nice dude to talk to. i had one of those for awhile, effed that up royally and now, even though we're talking again, it's a little strained. i just told the only nice, single dude in my life lately that i couldn't speak to him anymore due to "extenuating circumstances" involving a mutual friend- also, suck. you know how it is when you have that one person of the opposite sex who you can just talk to about anything, at any time? music, TV, politics, sandwiches, feelings on relationships, and why you might just buy a dog and call it a life instead of ever going on another date ever again...you know, that friend who is obviously NOT "just a friend" but your relationship is such that you can call it "just friends" and not really feel like you're lying, even though every time you get a message you feel that little *ping* of awesome inside? yeah, i don't really have that anymore. my "just friends" all have baggage attached to them and apparently i'm the item they decided to check instead of carry on. it's unfortunate, because it's nice to have that person you look forward to hearing from each day, or get excited to text pictures to of delicious foods/awkward advertisement posters/snapshots of weird things that remind you of them. i don't mean to sound quite so hapless and emo, i'm just thinking about how silent my phone is going to be for the next few hours and how i can hardly be disappointed over anything in particular because it's not like i'm being ignored by anyone on the other end- there just isn't anyone on the other end. 

le sigh.

i should probably start reading about Republicans and reconstruction and other exciting tidbits of our nation's history. not like there's anyone to distract me, anyway. ha.