An open letter to anyone who gets frustrated with their smartphone and longs for the good ol' days of the flip phone:

   QUIT YOUR BITCHING, YOU ARE WRONG.

   As a woman going on DAY 7 of 14 without her iPhone (as you may have seen on a previous post, mine washed out to sea last Saturday) and using a burner flip phone since Monday, I can say WITH 100% CERTAINTY that flip phones are NOT and NEVER WERE better than having a smartphone. Are they more durable? Yes. Are they more compact and easy to carry? Totally. Does their lack of technological functionality force you to focus on literally ANYTHING ELSE that isn't staring at your phone? Oh, absolutely. I've even started reading again. And blogging! CAN I NOT SEND A SIMPLE TEXT MESSAGE-today's preferred form of communication-WITHOUT GETTING A THUMB CRAMP? NO. NO I CANNOT. Moreso, I didn't realize how heavily my independence weighed on having access to my iPhone and the ability to carry on a conversation via any variety of messaging apps at any given time. Have I memorized ANYONE'S phone number? Nope, sure haven't, so making phone calls to people is off the table. Being able to entertain myself with social media/actual media/online window shopping/etc was such a HUGE part of why even when i was doing things alone, I never actually felt "alone". Now I'm sure there's a whole conversation to be had about what that says about today's generation of 21st century smartphone zombies, but now is not the time. 

   My message here, friends, is love your smartphone. Protect it. Respect it. Do not take it for granted because, though you may not realize it now, that tiny pocket computer is your best goddamn friend and without it, you'd be both figuratively and literally lost. Seriously. Not having access to WAZE is a real nightmare right now....*1 more week...*

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New Moon, New Year, New Me (kinda)